I was recently reminded of a conversation that happened when I moved from end user support to an architect. That conversation happened very candidly between myself and my husband. Could I let it go and make the transition from day to day support to potential leader of people and little to no interaction with the users?
After having a thought provoking conversation over Valentine’s dinner and my struggles with my current project. I realized that I am a social creature. I love the interaction of people. I am not an engineer that can sit by myself in a room. I crave the interaction. I need it.
So I have started my day filled with questions. Is this the job I want to do? Am I able to temper my passion for mobility to further the future of my company constructively? Can I make the transition? Can I work effectively with a team of people just like me and not feel like a brat child trying to get my way all the time.
As I struggle with myself I am finding more questions than answers. How can I be so self centered and egotistical as to not take a minute to think of those around me and the hell Im putting them through as I struggle with my identity. What does this say about any potential that I have for moving up in the world. I had an issue with a leader who couldn’t let go of the engineering tasks. I kept asking the question why he even hired me if he kept on insisting on doing it his way. It really got to me. Now I realize that Im like him in some ways.
They say with great leadership comes great responsibility. Well right now I am acting exactly like a displaced admin support person that I claim to have grown out of. Not like the architect that I am.
So my peers, I am working through this. If you have anything that has worked for you throw it out here.
Change is inevitable its what we do when presented with it that shapes our future.